I Used To Love My Body

by Jonathan Mann

/
1.
I used to love my body Head to toe You’d find me at a party Take off my clothes I feel ashamed My body’s changed Now my clothes stay on That part of me’s gone But I do believe you’re beautiful As you are, inside and out But I can’t quite find the lever to pull To extend that to myself I wanna be body positive Head to toe But come on it’s obvious I kinda hate myself I see a body I want I don’t like that at all Wanna forgive me For my anxiety And I do believe you’re beautiful As you are, Inside and out But I can’t quite find the lever to pull To extend that to myself I see friends on Instagram Showing off And I’m left wondering who I am Like I’m not enough You all look so good And maybe I should But my clothes stay on That part of me’s gone
2.
looking in the mirror de ja vu standing on a step stool with a mustache too long pants hot dance turn around wide stance funny how the sun sets are pretty when the smog gets thicker than a bowl of stew we're bathing in co2 I'm calling after you But you can't hear me I am a militant non militant against fundamentalism pro people i believe in us Love And the shaking leaves I remember you You remember me We've been here before A moment in time To ignore it would be a crime Mark Summers was covered in slime and he was obsessive Compulsive in the mirror 8 0 2 Hairy chest grows now And I'm the 3rd one through Off the track going back LIft off smoke stack Funny how the summer gets Nicer when the sun sets chased by korgano the moon join my rebel platoon we'll take over this rock soon we'll be scholars and tricksters and kings and queens led by science and love and the means of production will not matter, machines will do our bidding
3.
Drag me out into the summer heat I want to feel the grass beneath my feet I’m calling on the angels To cradle these storms With their kisses and their songs Drag the boy outta bed at midnight Four times around the sun, never seen the starlight I’m calling On the angels To keep the stars shining For his little blue eyes Before it all comes crashing down Drag the girl out among the trees She’s fascinated by every animal she sees I’m calling on the angels To protect the forest song With their tears and their bones Drag me off my phone and drag me out Give me the strength I need to forgive myself I’m calling on the angels To protect this house With their lungs full of stomps and shouts
4.
Living out in the desert He’s anxious and intense  He’s hummin’ Jonathan Richman Looking for a girlfren  He sees her looking at him Outside the punk rock club A friend makes the connection And he’s sure that he’s in love When all is said and done Is sorry ever enough Is it more than regret Is it less than a sin He remembers the moonlight Did she take take his hand He remembers lying next to her Did he misunderstand  He put his arm around her Fumbling in the bed Was he just being clumsy Or was it something else instead In the wild Santa Ana’s   Now they’re making out And then she says to him “Can you please drive me back to  my house” He felt inadequate In the backyard he was crying But now he’s looking back on it Wondering if he crossed a line
5.
Limited space Limited days Limited time In a limited mind Limited love There will never be enough Limited esteem From my heart to my dreams I’m stuck in this limited view I can’t see the future so I don’t know what to do Options are endless but my choices are few It’s hard to know what’s true Limited words For me to write Limited luck Riding with me tonight Limited will To do what I should Limited compassion To do good I am boxed in by my limited view I can’t see the future so I don’t know what to do Options are endless but my choices are few At least it’s the same for you Limited life Taking limited chances Asking limitedly To get limited answers Limited blood In a limited vein Limited neurons In your brain
6.
02:36
Times square was built on a swamp That river’s gonna do what it wants Hurricanes and the ocean gets higher The rain falls and there’s a wall of fire You know what it all comes down to 10 people that you have around you Will they be there a year from now? 5 years, 10 years, 50 years out Tragedy requires hope But I check out and I’m just like nope Lost in the dust bowl or bomb cyclone Looking for the dopamine hit from my iPhone Go bags and a midnight hustle My bones shake into my too tense muscle We do our best to ignore it The fact that they won’t let us live if we can’t pay for it
7.
All my friends don’t know what they’re doing Even the ones who have been successful If you’ve got a hero, look again You have diminished yourself in some way I always thought I would know what I was doing by now But I’m just as confused as I ever was I don’t think that this feeling ever goes away And I’m not sure it would be a good thing if it does All my friends are feeling the same way All my time is spent in a weird cage I can only do all I can I don’t have time I can’t do more
8.
03:54
throw a cob of corn into the sun, it'll be popcorn look at that old pile of hay, it's a dead body make your hand into a fist, a gun, or a laser can you roll your R's with your tongue 'cause i can He-Man, Skeletor You got toys and i got more I got a crush on Dawn I lay face down on the lawn little boy awake and terrified, why's he crying? he thinks about his mom and his dad, them dying that dream of being chased by someone he can't see that feeling of wanting to know who he'll be so big so tall we're all so small one mask we call a face won't be remember'd won't be replaced alone at home on a rainy sunday night, he’s writing thinking, “someday i'll live another life, exciting i'll fall in love with a girl that i've just met i'll wander darkened streets alone in jerusalem.” The hotel he doesn’t like He doesn’t win the open mic The summer ends and he’s in love Though somehow it’s still not enough Summer night silent and my wife is sleeping I’m watching my son’s chest rise and falling I’m wondering what he could be dreaming That feeling of wanting to know who he’ll be Fears piled on to fears Old feelings hot tears Wanting to hold on but no Trying hard to let go
9.
Just be quiet for once in your life In a few minutes be loud as you like But for now Forget what you’re going to say Do you feel that In the stillness It’s who you are With no bullshit In your chest the pain expands You feel heat radiate in your hands And your eyes Are filling up with tears You are not incomplete You are stronger Than you think you are And you belong here You may not Be remembered But you will never Be replaced You are more than the sum of your parts Hear the drip drop of the melting snow Tick tock goes the watch you feel the seconds glow And the sun Is banging down your door Time is constant It will outlast you So just watch those feelings Roll right past you They do your bidding But you have to feel them Even when it sucks All the bad things you ever did Every single ancestor that ever lived And they’re all Forgiving you right here They know What you’ve forgotten You can make mistakes All is not lost then You may not Be remembered But you will never Be replaced 0cc
10.
How could we forget the beginning of time Seems that’d be something we’d like to remember How could we forget before we were born What were we doing? Seems like that’d be something we’d want to remember But time only moves in one direction Nobody knows why How could we forget the meaning of life Seems that’d be something we’d like to remember How could we forget what’s beyond the edge of the universe I’d like to remember How could we forget if we had a past life? Seems that’d be something we’d like to remember How could we forget what it was like to simply be carbon I’d like to remember

credits

released January 8, 2019

Jonathan Mann played everything. Angela Sharp sang on Track 1.
Mixed by Nick Krill at Paperlab Recordings. Mastered by Jeff Lipton and Maria Rice at Peerless Mastering, Boston, MA.

license

tags

about

Jonathan Mann Jersey City, New Jersey

I'm a songwriter best known for writing a song a day. I've been at it for 10 years.

contact / help

Contact Jonathan Mann

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Jonathan Mann recommends:

If you like Jonathan Mann, you may also like: